T - 4 Days - She Believed She Could, So She Did

I used to think this saying was cliché. “She believed she could, so she did.”

Now it screams at me: YES GIRL. YOU CAN!!

But here’s the funny thing. I’m not sure I ever really believed I could.

I haven’t had a lot of belief in myself throughout my life. Maybe some of that comes from childhood, always feeling a little less than the other kids. Less money. Less popularity. Less friendships.

Somewhere along the way, I learned to question myself.

And honestly, I don’t believe I can do this without Jesus.

That changes the whole meaning of that little saying for me.

She believed she could, so she did.

Maybe it wasn’t that she believed in herself.

Maybe she believed in the One who told her she could.

I had been trying to do it all myself.

The last few years have brought more than my share of roadblocks and setbacks. Loss. Financial struggles. Relationships. Business. Relocating. Things happening that I never saw coming.

And somewhere along the way, I started to get frustrated.

Really frustrated.

I could feel my heart starting to harden, and I didn’t like the feeling.

There was so much pressure. Especially pressure I was putting on myself with Make Wellness.

I was chasing.

Chasing money. Chasing success. Chasing the next thing.

Trying to figure out how I was going to make enough to cover the debts, the setbacks, and everything else life seemed to throw at me.

And at some point, I realized I was chasing the wrong thing.

So I made a decision. I was going to stop chasing the money. Stop worrying about whether I was going to make enough.

Stop trying to control every outcome.

And instead, I was going to lean into the One who has always seemed to show me the way.

Then I started noticing a theme.

The conversations I was having all seemed to point in the same direction.

Lessons at church.

My mornings with God.

Conversations with friends.

Even group counseling.

Trust God.

I’ve always known that.

But knowing something and actually living it are two very different things.

So I went to God.

I got on my knees and asked Him:

“Please, Lord. Take this heaviness. Show me what You want for me.”

I asked Him to put the right people in front of me.

To let me walk with grace and mercy, love and kindness.

To show me what my purpose was.

And then came one of those moments that I can only describe as a God moment.

I heard it loud and clear.

You carry the love of Jesus in your heart. Share that love with the world while you travel.

Small reminders.

Little reminders that someone is not alone.

That someone is seen.

That someone is loved.

And then came the part that made me laugh.

I had been praying for a vehicle that would allow me to travel.

I had it.

So what exactly was I waiting for?

Then something happened that made me take a hard look at my own heart.

I had an experience recently that left me feeling... YUCK.

And instead of focusing on what someone else was doing, I started looking at myself.

I realized how easy it is to let disappointment, frustration and the constant setbacks of life change the way we see the world and the way we show up in it.

I could feel myself becoming harder, more frustrated and more focused on everything that wasn’t going right.

And I didn’t like it.

I didn’t want to become that person.

I wanted to be someone who could still choose grace. Still choose kindness. Still choose love.

That was another mindset shift for me.

Trust God.

Be obedient, even when I can’t see why.

I don’t have to understand the whole plan.

I just have to take the next step.

And then came the trip.

I knew I wanted to drive.

Airplanes and I have a very healthy relationship.

They stay over there. I stay over here. 😂

And when I found out it would cost around $900 to fly? Hard hell no. 😂

Originally, I didn’t even think I could afford to camp. I had O camping gear.. like, absolutely nada! lol

I told my sister-in-law that I thought it would actually be cheaper to stay in a hotel.

And then came another little nudge from God.

“Why are you not using this trip as an opportunity?”

Hmmmm.

Maybe this wasn’t just a trip to Dallas.

Maybe it was the beginning of something I had been dreaming about for years.

So I said yes.

And here is the really crazy part.

In about two weeks, I have gotten so organized for this trip that it’s actually a little scary.

Me. Organized. Camping. Solo. Driving.

Leaving little reminders of Jesus along the way.

Who even am I?! 😂

In 4 days, me and Ellie will pull out of the driveway and begin our maiden voyage.

Our first stop is Alabama, where we’ll camp for three nights.

I’ve never camped solo before.

This is completely outside my comfort zone.

And I’m doing it anyway.

Not because I suddenly became fearless.

Not because I suddenly believe I can do everything on my own.

Because I trust the One who told me to go.

I’ve spent a lot of time trying to figure out what my life was supposed to look like.

Maybe I was looking too far ahead.

Maybe I was supposed to simply say yes to the next thing God put in front of me.

Because I really do believe life is meant to say YES to things and figure them out later.

Sometimes the biggest act of faith isn’t knowing exactly where you’re going.

It’s taking the next step anyway.

So now when I look at this mug, I don’t think it’s cliché anymore.

She believed she could, so she did.

I just see it a little differently.

Maybe she didn’t believe in herself.

Maybe she believed in the One who told her to go.

And that is enough.

YES GIRL. YOU CAN!!

Four days.

A Jeep.

A dog.

A whole lot of faith.

And a road waiting to be traveled.

See you on the road. ❤️

Keep it Simple. God Loves You and so do I!